Thursday, March 27, 2008

Oh God, Not Again

by Anne

Fine! Play the Senators tonight! See if I care!

Whatever, just lose this game, then let Thibault and Petey play the rest of the season. I'm through.

On to other news. I've heard the idea/suggestion/rumor (I don't know exactly what to call it) that the Sabres are thinking about signing Pommerdoodle to a 10 year/$40 million contract.

I have one thing to say about that:


OMG, PLEASE DO IT

Locking up Pommerdoodle for a long time would make me very, very, very happy.

S(h)ara and I had a talk last night, and I have finally confessed that I'm growing up and Drew Stafford is no longer my favorite Sabre.

I'm sorry, Staffy, but all good things must come to an end.

But, where does that leave me? I'm like the lamb without Mary, a GMC car without OnStar, a peddlar without her wares, a ship with out a-


Captain


S(h)ara was first to suggest it and I quickly denied it. No! It couldn't be! Has he really wormed his sneaky little way into my heart? Impossible. Totally preposterous. It could never ever happen. No way

Sigh, ok, like Brangelina denied their relationship until she was like 62 months pregnant, I am now forced to admit it. My new favorite Sabre is:

Jason Pominville


Why is this difficult for me to admit? Because, as we all know, it is virtually impossible for any female to love Jason Pominville based solely on his skill as a hockey player. Most women love him because they think he's hot and they think "naughty" things when they think about him.

I, on the other hand, do not think dirty thoughts when I think of Pommerdoodle. As I've mentioned previously, it is Pommer's "I make bad things go away" influence on my life that makes him appealing to me. My love is pure as the snow Danny Pie-Yay sprayed in that goaltenders face a few games ago.

I could go on, but we all know why Pommer is great, I've already highlighted all the reasons in previous posts.

If you see Staffy, let him know I'm sorry.

Here's the current breakdown of my SabreHeart (only the top lines):


Look at that, Staffy and Pommer: Goose is ready to take your place should one of you hit a slump in which you score no points, have few great plays, and just overall fail at your attempts to court me.

The next line goes as follows:


This line tends to change the most. Generally it revolves around those 3 on the top, but Patty is ready to move in, should one of you neglect your Anne's SabreHeart duties.
6 games to go! Ugh, why?

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Glossary... Sort of

  • "Ryan Miller" Shutout - A 58 minute multi-goal shutout lead that is blown by Miller allowing one meaningless goal
  • Britney or SabreBritney - Thomas Vanek
  • Butter Snaps - Carolina Hurricanes
  • Craigory - Craig Rivet
  • Full Monty - Steve Montador
  • Greener - MATT Greene (LAK)
  • JBG - Jolly Blonde Giant - Tyler Myers
  • Little Foot - Drew Stafford
  • MK - Anne's sister; often leaves nonsensical comments under her Twitter name Mmmkizzle
  • Noodles - Derek Whitmore
  • Oscar - Anne's cat and STH's unofficial mascot
  • Parsley - Jimmy Bonneau
  • Sir Christopher - Chris Butler
  • Sissy - Jaroslav Spacek
  • Telly Monster - Mikael Tellqvist

Because It's Never not Funny


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