Saturday, May 10, 2008

Eastern Conference Whoop-di-doo

by Anne

It is rather tragic that for the 1st time in the past few years the boys in blue and gold are not vying for (and losing) the Eastern Conference Title. Whatev, if I can't have Pommers, I'll take RY-RY!


Yay! Win for the Pens! It was definitely a little disconcerting at the beginning when the Flyers came out blazin'. They had a really strong start but seemed to just lose their edge. It was weird. Although, the Flyers have lost game 1 of all their series thus far, this isn't necessarily an indicator that they're out.


So far no players in the 4 remaining teams have contracted botulism or ruptured an appendix while bending over to tie their shoes, but don't worry, I'm sure a rash of borderline life-threatening maladies is on its way.


Geno is a freakin' monster. It's funny, Geno shows off a lot more than Sid these days, Sid's taking more of the playmaker role (yes, he did score, that's true) but Geno scored TWICE. And he can score some crazy goals as well, see his last goal against the Rangers only a minute or 2 after skating for almost an entire powerplay. SICK. There are 2 reasons why Geno is not a threat to Sid's star status: 1) He's not Captain or captainly and 2) He doesn't speak English well enough to give interviews. Advantage: Sid. Whatev. I still love 'em both.


Worlds:


Sekera registered his first point of the tournament on an assist on the game-winning goal! He had 2 PIM, 4 shots on goal and was +2! Yay Reggie! They beat Slovakia 5-1


Who knew that Slovakia had a player named M. Hossa? I certainly didn't and my head was momentarily spinning. He also wears 81 (Marian Hossa wears 18) Further proof that Marian Hossa has an evil twin!! We must travel to Halifax and learn the identity of this "person" masquerading as a Hossa! Who's with me! The evil one must be STOPPED! OR IS #18 FOR THE PENGUINS M. HOSSA THE EVIL ONE?!?!? Wait, isn't Hossa Swedish? Reading penguins.nhl.com......reading penguins.nhl.com...nope, born in Czechoslovakia. Oh wait, I just remembered, he has a brother named Marcel.... searching..... searching.... reading the IIHF roster...yup, it's Marcel. Dang, this was more fun when Marian had a crazy twin. Boo.


Evil twin or Marcel?

Max had a goal and a primary assist in Russia's 4-3 shootout win over Belarus. Sorry Tits Bros!



Max appears to have misplaced the lower portion of his right leg


Canada plays Germany today at 3:30. The USA faces Russia on Sunday.



Private to Darce and Lar:

Please sign the players I want you to sign ASAP. You've kept my bloodlust at bay by signing Gerbster, but please get on top of your other contract signings. Thanks.

IF YOU DON'T RE-SIGN GOOSE AND BIG BEAR I'LL KILL YOU! M.J. WILL DIE (LITERALLY) IF MIKE RYAN ISN'T SIGNED. DO YOU WANT THAT ON YOUR CONSCIENCE?!?!

Loves ya!

Anne

3 comments:

  1. Go Pens!!

    Geno is a total BEAST, and I love the perpetually confused facial expression that he wears so well.

    I was thinking the same thing about the Geno/Sid dynamic...Sid's been flying under the radar (for as much as he can being the "Savior of the World" and all)...maybe that's why he's winning me over this postseason (or it could be the Chops...)

    Private to Darcy and Larry:

    I echo all of Anne's sentiments, and would like to add that if you do not sign Goose, I am not responsible for the physical harm I will inflict on both myself and others.

    ReplyDelete
  2. ::beep beepmikeryan beeeeeeeeep::

    Was that MJ?

    ReplyDelete
  3. Was that MJ?

    HOW DID YOU KNOW??

    SRSLY THE VERY SECOND!!!! you hear that Mikey-poo *MIGHT* have signed with another team, wait five mintues, stop what you are doing, and come to my house immediately because my head is in the oven. For real and for true.

    ReplyDelete

Glossary... Sort of

  • "Ryan Miller" Shutout - A 58 minute multi-goal shutout lead that is blown by Miller allowing one meaningless goal
  • Britney or SabreBritney - Thomas Vanek
  • Butter Snaps - Carolina Hurricanes
  • Craigory - Craig Rivet
  • Full Monty - Steve Montador
  • Greener - MATT Greene (LAK)
  • JBG - Jolly Blonde Giant - Tyler Myers
  • Little Foot - Drew Stafford
  • MK - Anne's sister; often leaves nonsensical comments under her Twitter name Mmmkizzle
  • Noodles - Derek Whitmore
  • Oscar - Anne's cat and STH's unofficial mascot
  • Parsley - Jimmy Bonneau
  • Sir Christopher - Chris Butler
  • Sissy - Jaroslav Spacek
  • Telly Monster - Mikael Tellqvist

Because It's Never not Funny


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