Thursday, November 6, 2008

Oh Google Analytics, Why Are You So Amusing?

By S(h)ara

First of all, let me start by saying that the Great and Wonderful Jochen "Yoyo" Hecht is back in the lineup. Oh Yoyo, you have been sorely missed. Sorely missed, indeed.

I let Anne talk about hockey and the important things people actually read this blog for, mostly because she knows more about it than me. Anne is Oprah and I'm like, Entertainment Tonight. Anne writes about the fierce awesomness that is the Portland Pirates, and I'm choosing to talk about the weird stuff that pops up on our google analytics. I'm lowbrow kids, that's how I roll.


Anyway, there are some totally normal things that pop up in our searches like "Nathan Gerbe" "Sabretooth's House" or "Sabretooth's House Blog". But do we care about such mundane matters? Nay, sir!

Apparently, many people have found our blog by searching for a wide variety of hockey players shirtless. (Thomas Vanek, Jason Spezza--ew--Evgeni Malkin, Brandon Dubinsky and James Wisniewski to name a few.) I don't think we have anything of that variety on here, do we?

Someone else searched for "Drew Stafford Ear". He has them, in case that's what you were looking for. Hope that helped.

I'm pretty sure Anne was the one searching for "Calgary Flames Bedroom Pictures", perhaps she even did a quick google for "NFL players best junk in the trunk". Whoever searched with the term "Damn it Feels Good to be a Gangsta" came to the right place, as Anne and I are in fact, Gangsta. Our collective pastiness should be proof of that.

Oh, and by the way there is more than one "crazy lady Elmwood Ave Buffalo". You're going to need to be more specific. Do you mean Jean, the former art professor who now has arguments with herself and people who aren't there? Or perhaps the lady in white?

"Is Maria Genero Gay?" I don't know, nor do I particularly care. Perhaps you should ask her.

"red bulldoodle". I couldn't agree more, sir.

6 comments:

  1. I totally saw the lady in white at wegman's the other day. It was like spotting a celebrity. I considered taking a picture.

    ReplyDelete
  2. "crazy lady Elmwood Ave Buffalo"
    I hope they weren't looking for me.

    Seriously though, I love the crazies on Elmwood. They're like old friends. You can always count on seeing them.

    ReplyDelete
  3. "Is Maria Genero Gay?"

    She does look a bit too happy at times...:P

    And if there were any shirtless pictures of Thomas Vanek on here, I would have to beg you to give me a link to that, haha.

    ReplyDelete
  4. It is impossible to say enough about what people search for on Google.

    ReplyDelete
  5. I love the crazies on Elmwood. They're like old friends. You can always count on seeing them.

    That's so true. Its like the area wouldn't be the same without them.

    And I just want to know if the person who found my blog via "Ryan Miller's original hair color" found what they were looking for.

    ReplyDelete
  6. I'm pretty sure Anne was the one searching for "Calgary Flames Bedroom Pictures", perhaps she even did a quick google for "NFL players best junk in the trunk".

    BTW, I'd like to meet the soul who searched for these terms, I think we'd have a lot in common.

    ReplyDelete

Glossary... Sort of

  • "Ryan Miller" Shutout - A 58 minute multi-goal shutout lead that is blown by Miller allowing one meaningless goal
  • Britney or SabreBritney - Thomas Vanek
  • Butter Snaps - Carolina Hurricanes
  • Craigory - Craig Rivet
  • Full Monty - Steve Montador
  • Greener - MATT Greene (LAK)
  • JBG - Jolly Blonde Giant - Tyler Myers
  • Little Foot - Drew Stafford
  • MK - Anne's sister; often leaves nonsensical comments under her Twitter name Mmmkizzle
  • Noodles - Derek Whitmore
  • Oscar - Anne's cat and STH's unofficial mascot
  • Parsley - Jimmy Bonneau
  • Sir Christopher - Chris Butler
  • Sissy - Jaroslav Spacek
  • Telly Monster - Mikael Tellqvist

Because It's Never not Funny


Disclaimer, yo.

Almost all of our pictures are borrowed from other sources. If they're yours and you don't want us to use them, just shoot us an email and we'll take them down.

We have nothing to do with the Buffalo Sabres, the National Hockey League or the actual "Sabretooth's House" located in HSBC Arena, we're just borrowing the name. If anyone is offended by anything we've written, get over it, it's a personal blog, not an accredited news source.

anniebeeswax [at] gmail [dot] com

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