Tuesday, May 6, 2008

Google Analytics is so Entertaining

by Anne

There was no hockey of any kind or of any interest last night, so I'm delving into more funny search engine terms. Most people only do this once every 5 months, but I think it's comedic genius.

I'm assuming the person that found this thing by searching for "(my full name)'s sabres blog", is someone I actually know.

Once again, I'm sorry I don't have shirtless pictures of:

Danny Briere
Henrik Lundqvist
Joel Lundqvist

This blog is not a hotbed for topless photos. However, I inadvertently came across this clip last night in which Danny Breire is shirtless in the background for about 4 seconds. So, enjoy:

To the person who searched for "whore" and "drury" Ha! My thoughts exactly.

"Carey Price interview + Glass of Milk" - It's strange that someone found this blog by searching for that, and stranger still that our blog does boast these terms.

"hahahahha" - We are pretty HILARIOUS

"jason pominville and brian campbell bringin sexy back" - they TOTALLY are, from coast to coast.

"the song when I need that old wa hoo" - Everyone needs a good old "wa hoo" from time to time. I hope we were able to provide it.

To those in search of middle names:

According to Wikipedia, Goose's middle name is Michael. According to his blog, Pommerdoodle's is John. Since many of you are interested in Kaleta's middle name...let's just say it's Jean-Luc and call it a day. Clarke MacArthur's middle name? Um, Olaf. Danny Briere? Igor. As I've said before, I'm telling everyone Ryan Miller's middle name is Horatio until someone can prove that its not.

Everyone's freaking out about playoff beards and their history. Most of the time I think I don't care, but then I got all bothered when I see that a player who previously had a beard has shaved it off. Cough Chris Drury cough.

Today, Team Canada faces off against Team USA, a prospect that appears to have Pommerdoodle piddling himself. Don't worry, Pommers, Team Canada is probably going to wipe the floor with you guys. Probably. Not definitely, just probably. They face off a 3:30 EDT. That's LAME. I'll still be at work, and I won't be able to watch it. That totally blows.

Whatevs! Go Team USA! I hope you don't get totally blown out of the water by your amigos on Team Canada! Woo!


  1. Gerbe's going to the Sabres' organization next year. I guess he didn't listen to Mama Gerbe. I found this out by wall posts, so it might not be official/true. If it is please take care of him. I'm afraid: he's going to be a (very, very, very) small fish in a big pond.

    Have fun with his height, but this thing is for sure: he is definitely no taller than 5'5".

    I'm gonna go cry/finish my philosophy paper.

  2. OMGAH!!! Molly! I'm sorry you're sad but I'M SO EXCITED! Hahahahahahaha. GERBE-DERBY! Ok we're still totally Lauren and Heidi style frenemies, but I can totally forgive him if he comes to Buffalo! Wooooo!!!! Yyay!!!! I hope its true or I'll be so sad!!


Glossary... Sort of

  • "Ryan Miller" Shutout - A 58 minute multi-goal shutout lead that is blown by Miller allowing one meaningless goal
  • Britney or SabreBritney - Thomas Vanek
  • Butter Snaps - Carolina Hurricanes
  • Craigory - Craig Rivet
  • Full Monty - Steve Montador
  • Greener - MATT Greene (LAK)
  • JBG - Jolly Blonde Giant - Tyler Myers
  • Little Foot - Drew Stafford
  • MK - Anne's sister; often leaves nonsensical comments under her Twitter name Mmmkizzle
  • Noodles - Derek Whitmore
  • Oscar - Anne's cat and STH's unofficial mascot
  • Parsley - Jimmy Bonneau
  • Sir Christopher - Chris Butler
  • Sissy - Jaroslav Spacek
  • Telly Monster - Mikael Tellqvist

Because It's Never not Funny

Disclaimer, yo.

Almost all of our pictures are borrowed from other sources. If they're yours and you don't want us to use them, just shoot us an email and we'll take them down.

We have nothing to do with the Buffalo Sabres, the National Hockey League or the actual "Sabretooth's House" located in HSBC Arena, we're just borrowing the name. If anyone is offended by anything we've written, get over it, it's a personal blog, not an accredited news source.

anniebeeswax [at] gmail [dot] com