Saturday, June 14, 2008

I CANNOT STOP LISTENING TO THE SONG "TOUCH MY BODY"

by Anne

So the title of this post has nothing to do with its content...OR DOES IT?

Reader Erin requested more pictures of Big Bear and I am one to readily exploit the men that I totally inexplicably have fallen head over heels for. Like, for series, my head is well above my heels.

Those men include Sissy Spacek, Jarome Iginla and BIG BEAR, to name a few. They are identified as men that, with no basis, I have decided that I must love. It's a calling. Like priests to the clergy, I suddenly loved them. The second I saw Big Bear I loved him. There is no earthly reason why.

Oh, there are multitudes of other men for whom I swoon, but I had to be convinced. There was no need to persuade me to love Ryan Whitney's playoff beard, I took one look and it was over. I had to warm up to Jordan Staal and Mike Green, it wasn't love from the get go.

BUT NOT BIG BEAR. It wasn't because of Soupy either. I had no particular emotional attachment to Brian Campbell nor any real aversion to his presence. He was gone and my world wasn't shattered. BUT BIG BEAR ARRIVED AND EVERYTHING WAS SUNSHINE.

Why? Well, for one, he refers to himself as a "Buffalo Sabres". Plural. He's done it more than once, that's more than a slip of the tongue, that's adorably improper English. The only time I forgive poor grammar is when English is not your native tongue. He seems like a genuinely decent human being, which is kind of a rarity in hockey. He discussed that he and Roysie went on man-dates. He answered a question of mine on Sabres.com. We should be best friends/ in love. Whichever you prefer, Steve. CALL ME.

The girlfriend forum tells me he has a high school sweetheart named Anne-Sophie. That's almost my name. We have no way of knowing if this is true, but I'm pretty confident this French version of me is probably also hotter, CURSES!!!

Oh Erin, ask and ye SHALL RECEIVE:



How freakin' CUTE is this picture?


Why hello 16th over-all pick


Please keep "Big Bear's Big Hair" underwraps.


Muuuuuuuch better, Barney


A few points:
I hope this person did not expect to get the entire team on that pennant
Big Bear manages to be adorable even when confused
Big Bear is right-handed. This is in no way relevant, but it's good to know.
Big Bear's driving by himself! Doesn't he have a lady to escort?!?!



OH.

MY.

GOD.

This hussy lives in San Jose, so she won't be stealing my man....?

Ok, he's clearly NOT my man in any shape or form, but omg, how smokin' hot does he look?



There are no words to describe how cute that interview is.
Buffalo has plenty to offer, Big Bear! I hope you got to see some of it!



Hahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha x 10,000,000


7 comments:

  1. "The second I saw Big Bear I loved him. There is no earthly reason why."

    I'm so glad we have that in common. My mom doesn't understand why I like him so much. I showed that interview to her, and she still didn't get it. That interview doesn't explain it? COME ON!

    And I can't stop listening to Hilary Duff????? Why her?? I have NO idea.

    ReplyDelete
  2. I also cannot stop listening to that song. It's a catchy song.

    ReplyDelete
  3. I used to hate it but all of a sudden I actually decided to listen to it and get over all the annoying "oh yeah"s at the beginning.

    Damn pop music!

    ReplyDelete
  4. "The second I saw Big Bear I loved him. There is no earthly reason why."

    Same with me, Anne and Dani. There was just something about him... and then when I met him he was so adorable and nice. Loveeee.

    And that song is so annoying but catchy. Especially the "I will hunt you down" part... yeah.

    ReplyDelete
  5. There's just something about Big Bear where you just instantaneously fall for him. Like I didn't pay him any mind at first because all I had to go by was that headshot--the one with the big hair. And then I was bored and on youTube and I was hooked on Big Bear. Just like that!

    He's just adorable. I think I've got this "girlfriend" thing figured out... You're Anne, and I'm Sophie, so Anne-Sophie isn't isn't one chick, it's just both of his girlfriends! :)

    ReplyDelete
  6. Soph, we can totally share Big Bear, I mean every other day and alternate weekends work for you? Holidays will have to be sorted out on a case by case basis.

    I remember looking him up on draft day and just getting this huge smile on my face from his cute little smirk in his roster photo and thinking "Ok,Anne, you can't possibly already love this guy" and then I heard him talk and he had a much more manly voice than I anticipated and I was a goner.

    ReplyDelete
  7. That would work with me. We'll have to figure in Canadian holidays too, like Boxing Day and Canadian Thanksgiving.

    I know that I wasn't expecting him to have that accent. I mean, his name's Steve. Not very French-Canadian, ya know?... So that's what won me over. Siiigh. When I met him last October, we were chatting in French and he was so happy. So cute! Siiiiigh. It should be illegal to be so adorable.

    ReplyDelete

Glossary... Sort of

  • "Ryan Miller" Shutout - A 58 minute multi-goal shutout lead that is blown by Miller allowing one meaningless goal
  • Britney or SabreBritney - Thomas Vanek
  • Butter Snaps - Carolina Hurricanes
  • Craigory - Craig Rivet
  • Full Monty - Steve Montador
  • Greener - MATT Greene (LAK)
  • JBG - Jolly Blonde Giant - Tyler Myers
  • Little Foot - Drew Stafford
  • MK - Anne's sister; often leaves nonsensical comments under her Twitter name Mmmkizzle
  • Noodles - Derek Whitmore
  • Oscar - Anne's cat and STH's unofficial mascot
  • Parsley - Jimmy Bonneau
  • Sir Christopher - Chris Butler
  • Sissy - Jaroslav Spacek
  • Telly Monster - Mikael Tellqvist

Because It's Never not Funny


Disclaimer, yo.

Almost all of our pictures are borrowed from other sources. If they're yours and you don't want us to use them, just shoot us an email and we'll take them down.

We have nothing to do with the Buffalo Sabres, the National Hockey League or the actual "Sabretooth's House" located in HSBC Arena, we're just borrowing the name. If anyone is offended by anything we've written, get over it, it's a personal blog, not an accredited news source.

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