Wednesday, June 25, 2008

Sometimes I post like 10 times a day

by Anne

Top things that are annoying as all get out:

1. Pink Sabres Jerseys that are NOT in support of Breast Cancer research



Ew.


2. Jaromir Jagr's landing strip facial hair WITHOUT the mullet. Separately they're gross, but TOGETHER?!?! I'd still hate Jagsie but I'd LOVE to see that combo. BTW, did you know that he's currently the wealthiest player (in terms of career earnings, not including endorsements) playing in the NHL right now? He's got over $90 million in career earnings at this point.


HOTTNESS.


3. When you screw up your coffee order and accidentally say "2 cream 1 sugar" when you really mean "1 cream, 2 sugar" (write that down, when this blog makes it BIG and one of you is my personal assistant... I prefer french roast).

I want one.


4. When you can't remember a password to an account you rarely check and you try every conceivable password and username combination you've ever used since 1996 and STILL can't remember it so they email it to you, but you have 3 email addresses and you don't know which one you registered with, and then sometimes those systems kick you off for a day if you try an incorrect password 5 times and then 10 minutes later you remember your password.


Clearly, not me, I'm not that calm when I forget a password



5. When people will NOT SHUT UP about calling Sidney Crosby a diver (yo, dude had PLENTY of nasty hits that were NOT called and he didn't whine about it, leave him alone)

Awww, look how cute he is!
And kind of doable as well.


6. When you save something in the wrong folder in a directory and your computer doesn't have that "recently edited documents" section on the file menu because you use software that doesn't use Microsoft Word's storage space and you have to go searching through the computer to realize that you inverted the file number and it goes in "07-1066" not "06-1077" and you spend serious time contemplating your potential dyslexia.

Not my actual computer screen


7. When Darcy makes apparently good draft choices and smart off-season moves and Bills tickets are selling like hotcakes and people in Buffalo STILL can find something to complain about. I, for one, would like to see Max go and TimmyHO stay. I don't know what it is about TimmyTims but I'd really like to give him another chance. Then, if he doesn't produce, dump him like a scummy blind date who doesn't even OFFER to pay and you even wore your expensive push up bra for this guy... which, ironically, might actually be what its like to go on a date with Tim Connolly.

Oh yes, that IS Darcy Regier

This dude has HIS tickets, DO YOU?!?!



8. Barry Melrose being the coach of the Tampa Bay Lightning. I'm not sure why this irritates me so much, but it just reeks of a wacky publicity stunt by the Bolts new owners. They have Stamkos, and now they have Melrose. I know he had a good run with the Kings in the early 1990s and, as a commentator, he's still aware of the pulse of the new NHL, but it just seems like if Barry was still interested in coaching, he'd BE coaching somewhere, not sitting in a studio. That's probably an unfair judgment seeing as how I don' t know the man. Maybe its just because I'm used to the studio version of Barry Melrose, but I can't see this being a great idea. It just feels like a bad idea, it'll bring more press to the Bolts next season, that's for sure. But, as a team looking to regroup and rebuild, is bringing in someone like Melrose really a good idea? I hope for the new owners' sakes that Vinny and Louie like him. Because, Jokinen and Voukun did NOT like Jacques Martin, but there were tight with the Panthers' owner, and look who lost his job? Ironically, look who is now traded to Phoenix. Bye, Olli! I seriously doubt that the Bolts will trade Vinny, I don't care HOW good Stamkos is, he's not Vinny Lecavalier.

How can you trust a man whose hair looks like that?
I wouldn't trust Brian Engblom as far as I could throw him.
Or Donald Trump.

Does one really need a REASON to post this picture?



9. Ryan Miller. Why? For some reason my love for Ryan Miller has tempered and in the clear light of the off-season, I'm seeing Millsey from a new perspective. Is he that good? Is he worth a 5+ year contract? Is he worth Lundqvist money? Only time will tell, I guess. He was OUTSTANDING for 2 seasons and then, not so much this season. But, how much of that was really his fault? Don't get me wrong, I want Miller to stay and sign an extension this summer (OMG MILLSEY, DON'T LEAVE ME HERE WITH THEM!) but I just wonder how this upcoming season will turn out for him. Some strong defense would go a long way to helping him out. TEPPO?!?! I think my fear for Millsey is more concern about his back-up situation than it is actual concern about him. When Miller is on (which was about 90% of the time in 05-06 and 06-07) he's amazing, but without a reliable backup, will he push himself to play more than he should, for the sake of the team? Will he ignore the urge inside him to sit this one out, because his backup is a wild card? The situation, and not really Ryan Miller is what annoys me.

Don't worry, Millsey, we'll find you a backup!!


10. Limewire. It ruined my laptop DON'T USE IT. WHATEVER YOU DO, DO NOT DOWNLOAD LIMEWIRE. IT KILLS COMPUTERS. DON'T DO IT!!!

THE DEVIL NOT THE NEW JERSEY ONES, LIKE THE BAD ONE WITH THE FORKED TAIL.... BRIAN GIONTA?

1 comment:

  1. "Then, if he doesn't produce, dump him like a scummy blind date who doesn't even OFFER to pay and you even wore your expensive push up bra for this guy..."

    Screw wearing a push up for Timmy -- reserved for Vincent.

    ReplyDelete

Glossary... Sort of

  • "Ryan Miller" Shutout - A 58 minute multi-goal shutout lead that is blown by Miller allowing one meaningless goal
  • Britney or SabreBritney - Thomas Vanek
  • Butter Snaps - Carolina Hurricanes
  • Craigory - Craig Rivet
  • Full Monty - Steve Montador
  • Greener - MATT Greene (LAK)
  • JBG - Jolly Blonde Giant - Tyler Myers
  • Little Foot - Drew Stafford
  • MK - Anne's sister; often leaves nonsensical comments under her Twitter name Mmmkizzle
  • Noodles - Derek Whitmore
  • Oscar - Anne's cat and STH's unofficial mascot
  • Parsley - Jimmy Bonneau
  • Sir Christopher - Chris Butler
  • Sissy - Jaroslav Spacek
  • Telly Monster - Mikael Tellqvist

Because It's Never not Funny


Disclaimer, yo.

Almost all of our pictures are borrowed from other sources. If they're yours and you don't want us to use them, just shoot us an email and we'll take them down.

We have nothing to do with the Buffalo Sabres, the National Hockey League or the actual "Sabretooth's House" located in HSBC Arena, we're just borrowing the name. If anyone is offended by anything we've written, get over it, it's a personal blog, not an accredited news source.

anniebeeswax [at] gmail [dot] com

ColorJunction