Thursday, September 18, 2008

Potential Favorite Rookie Nonsense

by Anne

I was working on a post discussing the HARROWING task ahead of me of choosing a favorite rookie, when Sabres.com decided to make my life harder by posting an article highlighting why Andrej Sekera and Mike Weber are totally awesome and why they should play in the NHL. BTW, the picture of #33 is not Doof. I'm not sure who it is, but Webby wears #34.

I DIDN'T NEED CONVINCING, ERIN POLLINA.

My choice for favorite rookie is going to be harder than I anticipated. S(h)ara and I were discussing choosing a favorite rookie last night. At the time, she was leaning towards Tim Kennedy and I was leaning towards Gerbe.



He he he



Gerb-dogg channels his inner Jason Pominville and gnaws on his mouth guard, seductively.


gross.



I can't forget Mike Weber in my hunt for a potential favorite rookie. I WANT to forget Mike Weber, because he might not crack the line up this October. Granted, if he doesn't, he'll be at the very top of the call-up list, I'm sure. BUT. Reggie will probably crack the line-up, and like Hank and Tone before them, can you really break up such a dynamic duo?!?! Sekera talks about how he enjoys having Webby there and how their styles compliment each other well, one a stay-at-home defenseman, one a more offense minded defenseman. Peanut Butter and Jelly, yin and yang, Bonnie and Clyde, Bran Engblom and his weave. THE TWO CAN NEVER BE TWAIN. WHAT MORE COULD YOU ASK FOR? ITS THE BEST PAIRING EVER IS REALLY WHAT IT IS.

So now I'm torn. Thanks a lot, Sabres.com and Mrs. Weber for having a son who has a universally praised work ethic and desire, knowledge and passion for the game. Loving Doof goes against my very nature as a human being. I've NEVER been the type of girl to fall for one of those kinds of people (defensemen), but might I make an exception for Michael? Could I? I'm just not sure if I can handle how "in flux" our relationship would be. Portland? Buffalo? Portland? Buffalo? My Bedroom? Portland?



Don't send Michael all the way to MAINE.


Who was driving? Was it Andrej?!
WERE YOU GETTING SMOOTHIES*

*oh yeah, I haven't given up on my "A smoothie a day makes a loss go away" philosophy, accept it, embrace it, love it, move on.

Nathan, Michael, battle it out at training camp. If they both make it, it will be a truly stressful time for me, choosing who to love more. GASP, if one makes it and one doesn't, it shall be a true test of my love. I will either rejoice or be consumed with sorrow. If they BOTH get sent to Maine, I may do something drastic like commit my heart to Tim Connolly, and THEN where will that leave us? Miserable and depressed, possibly pregnant, and DEFINITELY regretting our roster cuts, right Lindy? Do you really want it on your conscience that Tim Connolly has reproduced and I'm forced to accept his big fat monthly child support checks for the rest of my life? Please, Lindy, Jeep, Darcy, Brian McCutcheon, don't cut BOTH of them. Please?!?!

OK, WHAT THE HELL.

Sabres.com posts a Rookie Camp video and WHO ARE THE TWO PLAYERS THEY INTERVIEWED??!?!?! BRIAN WHEELER, DO YOU READ MY BLOG AND ARE TRYING TO STRESS ME OUT?!?!?!

Gerbe displays, once again his sparkling interview skills. I'm sure in the footage they didn't use, he thanked each player individually and knitted Lindy Ruff a winter cap that says "#1 Coach" and then talked Russia into backing off on Georgia once and for all. I have a feeling Nate Gerbe can talk anyone into doing anything. Do you think he can talk Derek Roy out of the fauxhawk? They'll be together a lot because Roysie is DEFINITELY going to be hanging out with the only guy on the team who's shorter than he is. COME ON YOU KNOW ITS TRUE.

Webby is rocking the "I'm just here to work hard and not take too much credit for my individual successes" attitude that makes me WEAK IN THE KNEES. When he first started talking, they weren't showing him and he sounded like Pommer. SOUNDING LIKE MY FORMER #1 WON'T HELP... ok I'm easily manipulated, so it actually might help but don't make a habit out of it, DOOF. The only downside I see to Webby is that his neutral facial expression reads less as "neutral" and more "I need to get to the nearest bathroom." I think he's been spending too much time watching Thomas Vanek video from mid-way through last season. OH YEAH. I WENT THERE.



I spend the time I should be doing homework updating my blog. That's just the way I roll.

2 comments:

  1. This comment has been removed by the author.

    ReplyDelete
  2. Check out the Finland goalie in the mouth guard picture. He wants some.

    You should totes go for Gerbs. He likes to sing pop/rap/country songs to himself while doing everything. Plus sometimes when he's dressed up he wears a kickass hat that makes him look like a leprechaun.

    BC makes most of its athletes communication majors, so if they learn anything from the school they'll learn how to do interviews that make sense. Gerbs was a comm major, hence his interview skillz.

    ReplyDelete

Glossary... Sort of

  • "Ryan Miller" Shutout - A 58 minute multi-goal shutout lead that is blown by Miller allowing one meaningless goal
  • Britney or SabreBritney - Thomas Vanek
  • Butter Snaps - Carolina Hurricanes
  • Craigory - Craig Rivet
  • Full Monty - Steve Montador
  • Greener - MATT Greene (LAK)
  • JBG - Jolly Blonde Giant - Tyler Myers
  • Little Foot - Drew Stafford
  • MK - Anne's sister; often leaves nonsensical comments under her Twitter name Mmmkizzle
  • Noodles - Derek Whitmore
  • Oscar - Anne's cat and STH's unofficial mascot
  • Parsley - Jimmy Bonneau
  • Sir Christopher - Chris Butler
  • Sissy - Jaroslav Spacek
  • Telly Monster - Mikael Tellqvist

Because It's Never not Funny


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