Monday, April 28, 2008

Nathan Gerbe is Totally Awesome

by Anne

I surely hope to see more sentences like this in years to come:

Sabres right wing Jason Pominville, playing the point on the United States’ No. 1 power-play unit, helped his team go 1 for 4 with the man-advantage. He also assisted on Gerbe’s goal.

Of course, instead of "playing the point on the United States' No. 1 power-play unit..." It's the Sabres PP Unit*.

*Expect a severly depressed and angry ranting post dedicated to Darcy if by some act of GOD we don't SIGN GERB-A-LICIOUS, man this nickname game is getting tough.

Sidenote, Peter Mueller of the Coyotes totally had the advantage over Sweden for his goal:

Sunday’s starter was Mikael Tellqvist of the Phoenix Coyotes.

Ha.

Ok, you know a team is young when Drew Stafford is talking about his "younger teammates" and it's more than 1 or 2 players. Staffers is 22. He's only like 3 months younger than I am. Team USA's average age is 24. That's WITH Tim Tom (34) and Halpie (32) averaged in.

I really breathed a sigh of relief when I read such good things about Gerbenheimersmith in the exhibition game. He can actually play past the college level! Ok, ok, it's only been one game, but it looks good. Kaner's probably really excited that he's no longer the smallest guy on the team. He'll probably stand next to him in all the team photos. When he gets to Buffalo, look for Derek Roy to be near him ALL THE TIME. I hope Gerb-o-rama and Roysie get along, haha.


You've probably already seen this, but, if you haven't, you HAVE to watch it:





Do you think Team USA is making up crazy tasks for Pommerdoodle to perform considering he's the only non-native born American? Does he have to constantly wear patriotic paraphernalia? Is he being forced to recite the Gettysburg Address or Preamble to the Constitution before each practice? Is he being rigged with spy gear and trying to sneak into Team Canada's practices? He can dazzle them with his French skills. They'll distract Derek Roy by getting him to stand near Gerbe-derby in a distant, undisclosed location. That way they'll never know... muahahahahahaha! Although, Roysie does have Louie on Team Canada with him, and that must boost his self-esteem.


GASP! I just read a summary of Team Canada's victory over Finland and was about to write how I was sad Roysie was left point-less when I read in the notes that he's sick! Noooooo!!! Get better Roysie! :(


See? I TOLD you Roysie was our emergency goalie

7 comments:

  1. That photo of Royzie will NEVER get old!!

    When he gets to Buffalo, look for Derek Roy to be near him ALL THE TIME.

    I'll admit, being a shorty, I tend to do this, too. There's nothing wrong with trying to feel better about yourself...right Royzie?? =P

    And I totally think we need a vote so we can decide on Gerberino's nickname once and for all!

    ReplyDelete
  2. "He also assisted on Gerbe’s goal."

    Effing hell yeah Pommers! That's the greatest news ever! I come home and see this! Thanks Anne for making my day! Gerbe is my height. Thats a fun size forward.

    ReplyDelete
  3. Gerb-ster is travel size for your convenience.

    ReplyDelete
  4. You guys don't have Gerbe Gerbs yet... one of my friends asked his mother in Denver if he's staying at BC and she said "Absolutely. He's getting his degree." We'll see if he listens to her. I hope he does.

    As for singing, I've never heard him sing country, but I was stuck next to him (and Bradford and Orpik) in Lower dining hall's infamous philly cheese steak like for 45 minutes the day they returned from Denver (they were on their way to Fenway). Some things that he sang/said over and over: "Just like a tattoo... I'll always have you...nanananana"
    "You're wayy too beauuutiful girl, that's why it'll never work"
    "Hey Brock! Hey Brock! Guess what!"
    "Fenway Franks! Fenway Franks! Fenway Franks!"

    By the way: every goal he scores is "Gerbalicious" that one was mine:).

    ReplyDelete
  5. Anonymous,

    You are a font of Gerb-Z knowledge.

    SIGH.

    I suppose Nate-Dizzle should listen to Mama Gerb-Z and stay and finish his degree. There's a rumour going around that there is life after hockey...I'm still investigating this. But, so HELP ME if he doesn't get the Hobey this year, I'll be peeved. No "playing dirty" accustations, Nathan Detroit! (ok, these nicknames are getting out of control when I'm referencing musical theatre characters)

    College RAWKS, I can't blame him for wanting to stay.

    There will be a wee little Nathan Gerbe shaped hole in my SabreHeart until he gets here. (Think of how big that hole will get if Gerb Master Flash isn't totally freakin' amazing when he gets here. Ha, j/k he totally will be. Woooo!)

    ReplyDelete
  6. Anonymous. I love you. I'm also SO JEALOUS you got to be within arms length of Gerbs AND hear his singing.

    I thinking I need a road trip to this school.

    ReplyDelete
  7. Due to how Gerbe seems to be an amazing player despite being vertically challenged I decided to call him “The Hobbit.” I mean really, he’s short, but he [may one day] oppose the forces of [the] evil [Ottawa Senators, Toronto Maple Leafs, and NY Rangers].

    ReplyDelete

Glossary... Sort of

  • "Ryan Miller" Shutout - A 58 minute multi-goal shutout lead that is blown by Miller allowing one meaningless goal
  • Britney or SabreBritney - Thomas Vanek
  • Butter Snaps - Carolina Hurricanes
  • Craigory - Craig Rivet
  • Full Monty - Steve Montador
  • Greener - MATT Greene (LAK)
  • JBG - Jolly Blonde Giant - Tyler Myers
  • Little Foot - Drew Stafford
  • MK - Anne's sister; often leaves nonsensical comments under her Twitter name Mmmkizzle
  • Noodles - Derek Whitmore
  • Oscar - Anne's cat and STH's unofficial mascot
  • Parsley - Jimmy Bonneau
  • Sir Christopher - Chris Butler
  • Sissy - Jaroslav Spacek
  • Telly Monster - Mikael Tellqvist

Because It's Never not Funny


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